THE CHURCH OF STARBUCKS

Our own Matthew Lysiak has written an article about Andrew El-Khadi, who is waging a grass roots campaign to save his favorite Starbucks from being shut down.

El-Khadi, 25, a computer technician at St. Francis College, has 16 signatures on his petition.

I'm struck by the similarities to the fight to save the Green Church.

Hofmo handed over 16 signatures in the first batch of petition

Both causes have the exact amount of signatures. Will they both be saved? Thirty-two people hope so.

STABBING

Evidently there was a stabbing at 83rd and 5th within the past hour. The details are murky but here's what I heard: Three youths tried to hold up a meat store at 83rd and 5th. The guy behind the counter came at them with a meat cleaver. One kid was stabbed, the other two ran off. The two who ran off were caught. The one who was stabbed got away.

That's what I heard on the street. Anyone have any details?

SON OF A --

Son of a bitch, Starbucks IS next!!!

First the Forbidden City and now Bay Ridge! Oh the humanity!

DJERGONE

Djerdan is now Djergone. I walked by the store on 79th and 3rd the other day and the place was empty! I guess Balkan food isn't so popular in the Ridge.

First Ola Baby and now Djerdan? What's next? The Starbucks?

GETTING GASSED

What is it with me and cars this week?

The other day I took my car to the Mobil on the corner of 81st and 3rd for a tuneup. I've taken the car there before and I like Paul the manager. I end up getting a tuneup, a squeaky belt replaced, and a few other things. Total: $371.00. A bit high I think but they do good work.

Usually...

This time however, not so much.

I pick the car up and while I'm driving home I flick the switch to wash the windshield. No windshield wiper fluid. I look at my receipt and it says "top off all fluids." Hmmm, I think. Maybe they just forgot. So I decide to stop by the next day.

The next day I pull in to the garage but Paul isn't there. I tell another guy who's working there that I came in the day before for a tuneup but they forgot to top off the windshield wiper fluid. The first thing the Mobil employee says to me is that the garage is closed. I found it very odd that the garage would be closed at 1:30pm, so I tell him again that I had a tuneup the day before and they forgot the windshield wiper fluid. I also mention to him that I spent $371.00 and wanted them to finish the job.

So the employee opens the hood and tops off the wiper fluid. He looks at the coolant and says they didn't put in any coolant either. So now I'm thinking, "I paid $371. 00 and they didn't check any of the fluids!?" My faith in Paul was plummeting.

So the employee tops off the coolant. He checks the oil. Everything was fine. At least they did the oil. The guy hands me the container of coolant and tells me it's mine. Bring it back the next time. I thought this was odd but took it and got back into my car.

Here's where the fun begins...

The employee says, "That'll be $20.00."

I reminded him yet again that I had brought the car in the day before and asked him if he needed me to go get the receipt.

Oh no, he didn't need the receipt. He needed the $20.00. I told him I wasn't going to pay it. He smirked and said in broken English that I had to pay.

I then went from 0 to 10 in .02 seconds. I told him there was no way I was going to pay him $20.00 to do a job they were supposed to do the night before.

He tried to explain something to me that still baffles me:

There are two businesses at that Mobil. The garage and the gas. He's the gas guy. Paul rents the garage. Since I got fluids from the gas guy, I needed to pay $20.00.

That didn't sit too well with me. Never in my life have I heard of a gas station having two businesses. I asked him how anyone was suppose to know there were two businesses there? He couldn't come up with an answer.

So, the yelling went back and forth a little longer until I told him to have Paul pay him the $20.00. His face dropped and looked as if I had solved the secret riddle. He went inside, made a call, came back out and said everything was fine.

So now, although I still like Paul, I will never take my car back to that garage. Paul's mechanics didn't do some of the basics of a tuneup, so I'll never be able to trust that they've actually done the work. And I refuse to go to a place where they try and swindle you by saying "oh, I"m the gas guy, not the garage guy, even though we're all wearing Mobil shirts."

AMERICA FOR AMERICANS

So the other day I was driving down 75th street from 3rd Ave to 4th Ave. Doing the speed limit, moving right along. I looked in my rearview mirror and I saw a car barreling down on me. He was doing, I'm going to guess, 60 mph. He tried to pass me but the the oncoming car posed a bit of a problem for him. He laid on the horn as we approached the green light at 4th and 79th. Through the light, he went flying by me, and was in front of me at the light at 79th and 5th. I looked over and expected to see a young guy but he turned out to be an older guy.

Here's where it gets fun --

He rolled down his window and started yelling at me, calling me "unpatriotic," a "f*cking traitor," and said I should be "shot and killed."

My first thought was "hey, this guy reads my blog."

But then he yelled something about Japan. I immediately thought he was talking about my daughter, who's from China. In the world of crazy old coots, Japanese and Chinese look the same.

Then it dawned on me -- I was driving a Toyota. He thought I should be shot and killed for driving a car from a Japanese company. Never mind that the car was most likely put together by American workers and that his "American" car was most likely loaded with Mexican parts. I was driving a car made by the "enemy" and he was driving American Made.

The one upside in my favor: if he ever tries to chase me, he'll have to stop three times for gas while I continue on one tank.

GOOD KID: 1, BULLIES: 0

Last month I posted about Andrew Johnston, the English boy with the voice of an angel. He didn't win Britain's Got Talent. He came in 3rd.

This kid really wants to make something of himself. He gets bullied by the kids at school because he sings. And he was heartbroken when he didn't win. He wanted to win to help his mom. A really sweet kid.

I just read that he has signed a £1 million deal with Simon Cowell's record label.

So when does the movie of his life come out?

Well done, Andrew.

WHAT A CATCH!!

I saw this on McBrooklyn and had to post it, even though I'm probably the last person in the US to know about it.

And let me say how much I love McBrooklyn. It's one of the best blogs out there.

NOT IN MY HOUSE, BRIT!

To celebrate Independence Day, the Bay Ridge Brit and I will be performing "Uh-Uh, Not in My House, Brit!" Come watch as I bitch slap the Brit's empire and then dupe him into going into Iraq with me.

Performances will be held at the Green Church Performing Arts Center. Hot dogs and cucumber sandwiches will be served.

Happy Independence Day!

STARBUCKS TO CLOSE 600 STORES!

It's a dark day for Starbucks lovers. The mighty giant announced today that it will be closing 600 stores! Will any of the Bay Ridge stores be axed, I axe you? Stores will start closing in July. Oooo, how I hope we're spared. We NEED 4 Starbucks within shouting distance. Don't we?