What the hell is wrong with kids these days? In my day we got drunk the olde-fashioned way: sneaking into our parents' liquor cabinet and drinking the alcohol. We did not stick things up our other holes.
A student at the University of Tennessee nearly died from shoving too much boxed-wine - yes you read that correctly - boxed-wine up his poop chute. His blood alcohol content was well over .40, the point at which, you know, you can die.
Kids - stop sticking things up your south holes to get drunk. Drink your drinks like the rest of the world.
But I am a tad curious about how you play beer pong.
Trader Joe's Valencia Creamy Salted Peanut Butter has been linked to salmonella infections that have sickened 29 people in 18 states. Four people have been hospitalized.