OH THIS CAN'T BE GOOD

According to a New York Times/CBS News poll, a whopping 81% of Americans believe the country is heading in the wrong direction.

81%!?

That's nearly EVERYONE polled!

EVERYONE!

If you're President Wanker (and I don't wish that on my worst enemies) that can't be good. But you know our lil' wanker, public opinion means nothing to him.

But come on, I mean really, how can he brush this aside.

Nearly EVERYONE thinks we're going in the wrong direction!

I suppose he could say that he finally united us.

POLL RESULTS

Ooooo -- the results are in from the latest poll and it doesn't look good for our Commander in Chief. 57% think he is beyond the worst President ever. A catastrophic failure. Couple that with the 9% who think he's just plain old the worst President ever, and that's a whopping 66% that think he's -- well -- pretty darn horrible. 19% think he's the best President ever (most likely a drunken 19%) and 14% think he's no Fillmore but all in all he's been ok.

POLL RESULTS

The historic results are in! And what a nail-biter! For the first time ever we have a tie. 50% love the polls and feel they bring meaning to their lives and 50% thought I meant people from Poland. So to appease everyone who voted (a record turnout -- 12 -- stop the madness) I bring you Jane Krakowski. Jane is of Polish descent and brings meaning to my life. Take away the "ski" and you have Krakow, the City Beautiful. Krakow is also the cultural capital of Poland, which means it has a library. And back in my former life, I did an episode of Ally McBeal with Jane.

And for all of you who are Poll-litically incorrect, I bring you a few old favorites:

Q. How do you sink a Polish battleship?
A. Put it in water.

Q: How did the Germans conquer Poland so fast?
A: They marched in backwards and the Polish thought they were leaving.

Q: Why wasn't Christ born in Poland?
A: Because they couldn't find three wisemen and a virgin.

Thank you, I'll be here all week. Enjoy the free buffet. Don't forget to tip your waiter, but run like hell when he gets back up.

POLL PARADE

For those of you who can't get enough polling (or need even more meaning in your lives), Righty has a polling place that'll knock your socks off. Tell him Lefty sent ya.

NEW POLL RESULTS

The results are in and a whopping 54% are here for Melisa Christian. 27% love the Newsreel while 18% think it clutters up the site. The votes for Melisa are a tad suspect as I've heard whispers there was shameless ballot stuffing in LA. I shall resist writing anything crude about "ballot stuffing" nor will I write "insert joke here" and I will certainly resist writing "insert joke here about 'insert joke.'" I shall not sully my love for Melisa by shoving in some old limp rib.

POLL

I've been playing around with the sidebar (not a euphemism) and would like to get people's opinions. You can post a comment or take the fancy poll in said sidebar.