TIME IN A BOTTLE

Time may not be on the side of the Committee to Save the Green Church, but if all goes well they'll soon have a time capsule.

According to my blind soothsayer source, a capsule is buried somewhere in or under the Methodist church. It contains an early history of the congregation and pictures of the original 1830 church, the second church on Stewart Avenue and the current-soon-to-be-pulverized church.

Reverend Emerick and the church's board of trustees had no idea it existed until just recently. Will they look extra hard for it? I hope so. I'm sure the congregation, the community, and local historic society's would all love to see what was buried so many years ago.

The church may not be able to be saved, but we have a chance to give life to the people who buried the time capsule. I've always felt that unearthing a time capsule gives immortality to the people who took the time to bury it.

UPDATE: The Brooklyn Paper has a more in depth article about the time caspule.

BAY RIDGE JOURNAL

A Bay Ridge blog that has really stepped it up in the past few months is Bay Ridge Journal. Concentrating mostly on Preservation issues and the fate of the Green Church, the Journal goes beyond banging pots and is a very proactive and informative blog.

Bookmark it, read it, then do something!

And you have to love someone who lists Blue Velvet, Paris Texas, and Moby Dick in their favorites lists.

HYPOCRITES AND CONTRADICTIONS

I love these two quotes about the Green Church. The first is from January 24, 2008.

“The building (The Green Church) is falling down. It’s crumbling. The building is not safe.”

And then less than a month later, on February 14, 2008.

The Bay Ridge United Methodist Church lent its beautiful interior to the Guild for Exceptional Children on Feb. 11 for a concert fundraiser...Green Church pastor Robert Emerick even joined in with the musicians, playing tamborine.

Such a courageous fundraiser.

LOSS OF FAITH

It's a rainy day here in the Ridge and what better day to muse on the impending destruction of the Green Church.

I don't know Pastor Robert Emerick, pastor of the Methodist "Green" Church. I've never met him and know very little about him. What I do know of him is from the press. I could be angry with him but I think I'm mostly disappointed in him.

Pastor Emerick is a spiritual leader and a leader of the community, but from what I've witnessed he's been more divisive than a leader.

The battle for the Green Church has been particularly nasty. The preservationists and the congregants both must shoulder the blame. But I'm disappointed that a spiritual leader couldn't rise above it all. Emerick couldn't bring the two sides together peacefully. I'm sure he would say that he did try but the preservationists wouldn't cooperate. But being a leader isn't easy. If it was, everyone would be a leader. But I haven't seen Emerick possess any leadership qualities.

“It is none of your business, or anyone else’s” said Pastor Robert Emerick.

While technically this may be true, what we're talking about is a building that has been a part of this community for 108 years. Perhaps turning the church into a town hall or performing arts center would be for the greater good and not just the Methodists good.

“I have decided that I am not going to dignify this process with a response any longer,” Emerick said. “I am not happy with how the media has handled this, so I am not going to answer any more questions.”

Yeah, that's good leadership. Just shut down when things don't go your way.

Emerick was later quoted as referring to the remains as “only dust."

How very sensitive.

“The group is thinking of Bay Ridge in the golden age of its past. They’re appealing to emotions,” he said. “This is a small group of people who think of the old church in terms of the old little red schoolhouse.”

No, the people are thinking of it as a part of the fabric of the neighborhood.

“The building can’t be saved. The old stones can’t be restored. Saving it just won’t work,” said Rev. Emerick. “It would take millions of dollars to do the job. Even if that was successful, in a few decades we’d be raising funds again to save it.”

Actually, in the late 1990s, the church itself approached the Landmarks Preservation Committee for designation. A structural analysis was done and it was determined that the stone was the problem. Serpentine stone is porous and flaky. A firm came in and offered a few suggestions.

1. Replace the stone with a like stone. Replacing it with serpentine or a similar stone would be costly and in years we'd be right back to where we are now.

2. Replace it with some kind of tinted concrete or pre-cast stone. While this would structurally sound, the church would be ineligible for landmark designation.

When the church showed up recently on a realtor's website, listing the property for sale, this is what Emerick had to say.

"The preservationists are behind this buzz," said Pastor Emerick. "People have a tendency to see an assumption as a fact. The assumption is wrong, and so, then of course, is the so-called fact."

The ad was on Dakota Realty's website. When a reporter called, he was told the seller was Betesh, the man who purchased the property from the church. "Assumption?"

Councilman Gentile tried for a win-win situation. Not only was his offer turned down but Emerick demonstrated outside Gentile's officer, holding a sign that said

“Please Stop Hurting Bay Ridge United Methodist Church.”

It will be sad to see the Green Church destroyed. But what's sadder is the faith in Pastor Robert Emerick, a community leader, has been destroyed.

GREGORY HOTEL STRIKES AGAIN

I go away for one day and there's another death at the 'Gory Hotel??!!

According to the Brooklyn Eagle --

"Early Friday afternoon, the body of an unidentified Asian female was found at the hotel with a knife in her chest..."

A knife in her chest!? Oh man, you've got to be pretty strong to plunge a knife into someone's chest. Whoever killed her must have been --

"...and a suicide note."

Are you kidding me!? A suicide!? Yeah, nothing says "suicide" more than a knife plunged into your own chest. I jump around and howl if I get a paper cut. How is it that a woman can impale herself with a knife and not scream bloody murder?

Speaking of murder? Could it have been murder? Nope. Remember there was a suicide note. And if there's a suicide note, who can argue?

I mean, look at the John Rossi suicide. Rossi shot at himself and missed (when you're that close to yourself it's easy to miss), shot himself in the chest, and then when that didn't work, shot himself in the head. Some may say that's a tad suspicious, three shots and all, plus that little fact that he was going to be a key witness in a grand jury trial. But there was a suicide note.

Verdict: suicide.

But even if there isn't a suicide note, it's pretty obvious when a death is a suicide. Take Paul Mento, for instance. He checked into the Gory Hotel in February and placed duct tape over his mouth and nose. Obvious suicide. I mean, isn't that the most efficient way to commit suicide? And there's no way in hell a person is going to reach up and rip the tape off when he starts to choke.

This is the 3rd dead body in 6 months that has been found at the Gory hotel. And you know what that means? The Gory Hotel is officially the place to die in Bay Ridge.

Just don't plan on being buried at the Green Church.


The Rover also covers the events.

Voodoo Knife Holder pic courtesy Gizmodo.

DEVIL'S WORK

The Devil is busy at work on the corner of 4th and Ovington.

My daughter and I walked past the Green Church today to see that demolition of the Methodist Church is nigh. Workers have started removing the 211 bodies that were interred at the church in 1901.

Pastor Robert Emerick once said “We are a competent religious organization and we know how to handle human remains.”

And look at how they're handling it. They put up a garbage bag wall so no one can see how well they're handling the human remains. I climbed a ladder to see this: a back-ho and some guy looking in a hole. Very very holy. Remind me not to have them handle my remains.

On the other side of the church was a man, who I think said he was a retired head of the NY Cemetery Regulation. He was there to make sure the bodies "found a final resting spot. They deserve that." Um -- this is the 3rd time they've been moved. How many times does a dead body have to be moved before it reaches its final resting spot?

But this guy didn't just make sure everything went smoothly. He also got into a shouting match with Dorcas Kimball's mother about who said what at a CB 1o meeting. I don't know who was right but this guy didn't know how to talk to a woman. "Jerk" does not begin to describe this guy.












So here's my guess as to what is going to happen, and remember, you heard it here first:

• The congregation will tear down the church (it's their contractual responsibility).
• Betesh (the new owner) will sell the property (he already has it on the market, and his company is a management company, not a developer)
• The new owner will not build a church on the property
• Betesh and Emerick will shrug and say they have no legal ground to force the new owner to build a church
• A butt-ugly condo will be built and the new owner will hire Betesh to manage it
• Gentile will say he did all he could do, even though the church hired lobbyist James F. Capalino and Associates and lobbyist George Fontas, who happened to run Gentile's 2003 election.
• Emerick, who is not planning on building the congregation, will miraculously be offered another job at another church with a congregation in double digits.
  

So you better get a good last look at the church. The way things are going, the bulldozers will come in under dark of night to tear down the church, just like some of Bay Ridge's other beautiful buildings have been torn down.

And when it's all said and done, Bay Ridge will be the sucker.

IT'S BACK!!

Just when you thought it was safe to praise Jesus in peace, the Green Church controversy raises its serpentine head again.

As you well know, the church was purchased by Abe Betash a scant few months ago. But last week an ad was found on Craig's List, listing the church property for sale for $11.5 million.

Craig's List? An $11.5 million property for sale on Craig's List!? Why don't you just write on some construction paper and tape it to a telephone pole? I mean, who sells something for $11.5 million on Craig's List!?

Dakota Realty.

“Property ID 76-Commercial, Land, Land-Residential (land), for Sale in Bay Ridge, address: Ovington Ave. and 4th Ave. — Property Description: Huge corner property in great location! Total Buildable sq. ft. 87,742. Asking $11,500,000.”

The listing was also on the Dakota Realty website, but was quickly taken off when Dakota realized they had stepped into a tempestuous storm.

“We don’t want to get involved with this. We don’t want to be involved in selling the property. We’re getting too many questions about this. It was an open listing. The buyer is still selling it. We just removed the list off our web site.”

According to the Brooklyn Eagle

"Betesh Monday denied that he is seeking a new buyer, but plans are moving ahead for development."

So Betash says he's not selling, but a realty company, who said Betash was the seller, listed the property for sale.

And Betash is

"looking for an 'educational component' at the site."

So he plans to knock down a church and a school so he can build a church and a school.

I can't wait to see how this plays out.

BAY RIDGE TO SEE MCGREEN

In a surprise move, McDonald's Corp has purchased the Bay Ridge Methodist Church and will turn the church into a retirement home for their "high profile" employees. The Green Church, as it is known locally, will be renamed McGreen Acres.

"Bay Ridge is a wonderful community," said a McDonald's spokesman. "It's the perfect community for our aging HP employees."

Both Mayor McCheese and Uncle O'Grimacey are expected to move in when construction is completed in the spring of 2009.

"Grimace would have loved it here," said Uncle O'Grimacey.

Grimace, the beloved and well-meaning simpleton, was tragically killed in 2005 by The Happy Meal Gang over a $10 gambling debt. His body had been found at the Bay Ridge Gregory Hotel.

SHOULD IT STAY OR SHOULD IT GO?

I came to the Green Church Should It Stay or Should It Go Ball late and may have to leave before the dance is over.

I knew both the Preservationists and Rev. Emerick and the Congregation weren't getting along but I had no idea how bad it was.

I posted a great article (heavily slanted towards the Preservationists and condemning Rev. Emerick and the congregation) by Shavana Abruzzo about the fate of the Methodist Church and an equally great comment (equally as heavy condemning the Preservationists) from an anonymous writer.

The inevitable destruction of the church is sad to me. I think it's a beautiful work of architecture and would love to see it stand for another 108 years. (And God knows I'd like to be standing for another 108 years).

But what's sadder is how the fate of the church has become a divisive issue in my new community (we've lived here for a year). The two sides show no signs of being able to come together and talk about the issues at stake. (It also saddens me that there are two sides and not one community dealing with the issues).

And really, can you blame either side? Both have hurled insults at the other while firmly believing they are in the right.

But what is right for the community?

Maybe tearing it down is ultimately better for the community. The church could use the money to continue its outreach programs. (Maybe it's because I'm new here, but I haven't heard anything about what the church does for the community. And I mean details.)

Maybe preserving the church is the right decision. It could be turned into a community center or housing for senior citizens while the church earns revenue. (But I have yet to hear the real details on the offer Councilman Vincent Gentile and Con Ed made to this end)

Sadly I don't think we'll ever know what would be best for Bay Ridge since the community has been unable to come together on this hotly and fiercely debated topic. Both sides can blame the other for not coming together, but in the end we have no one to blame but ourselves.

Whatever the eventual fate of the church will be, hopefully we'll all learn from this Clash and not let a community be divided in the future.

A BUNCH OF CODSWALLOP

Shavana Abruzzo has written a brilliant article about the fate of the Green Church. From the start she doesn't mince words

Any borough that would rid itself of a beautiful, 108-year-old church, on the premise that it is somehow beyond repair, is a short-sighted one, unmindful of its historical importance and deserves to OD on over-development for gluttony’s sake – plus be renamed ‘Dorian Gray.’

And anyone who uses the word "codswallop" is a bobby-dazzler in my book.

One cannot traverse a mile in the United Kingdom without happening upon a centuries-old structure...For the congregation of United Methodist to prematurely doom its church to the dogs is a bunch of codswallop.

SAVE THE GREEN CHURCH VIDEO

Here's a great video by Bay Rizz about the effort to save the Green Church.

GREEN CHURCH RALLY

The Committee to Save the Bay Ridge United Methodist Church will have yet another rally on Saturday March 29th at 11:00am.

Frankly I think instead of banging pans in front of the Green Church, they should be rallying in front of Bloomberg's office or in front of the Landmarks and Preservation Commission's office. It's fine and dandy to "honk if you want to save the Green church" but bringing attention and media to the mayor's office, or the LPC's office, or the borough President's office might be better for the cause.

IDES OF MARCH RALLY

Here's the info for the Committee to Save the Bay Ridge United Methodist Church Rally. The New Orleans Funeral idea has been scrapped.

Personally, I would have gone with an Ides of March idea. It's the 15th, you know. Have someone dress up like Caesar but with "Bay Ridge Community" written on him and and someone else dress up like Brutus but look like Emerick. Then spend the whole rally watching Emerick stab the community in the back. But that's probably way too mean.

And for anyone looking to contact the Preservationists, their email is savethegreenchurch@yahoo.com.